


Changes

by deaanbeaan



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Bi-Curiosity, Bullying, Eventual Happy Ending, Eventual Romance, Falling In Love, Fluff and Angst, Friendship/Love, Love Triangles, Multi, Trans Draco Malfoy, Trans Male Character, Transgender, Transitioning, Transphobia
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-01-21
Updated: 2019-01-21
Packaged: 2019-10-13 16:34:13
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,065
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17491430
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/deaanbeaan/pseuds/deaanbeaan
Summary: Draco comes out as trans during summer. Going back in fifth year is hard as all his friends hate him and he has to wait a year to transition. He finds unlikely allyship with the golden trio, but will his feelings for Harry complicate things?





	1. Chapter 1

Draco wasn’t confident about going into his fifth year. On one hand, it would be a good break from his home life, on the other, he would have to face his classmates. No one knew he had came out as trans over summer, so he imagined there would be a lot of rumours. Of course, some people probably heard, and it was probably common knowledge by now. What would be most awkward would be the humiliation of having to stay in his own room, as Dumbledore and Snape thought it wouldn’t be right for him to stay with the girls anymore, but it would be too dangerous to put him in with the boys. Mind you, it wasn’t that they seemed to care about his safety, it seemed more like they didn’t want to get in trouble with equality laws. Luckily, Draco had the law on his side, even if the majority of the wizarding world weren’t too fond of trans people. Although, magic did seem to make transitioning easier. Well, in theory it did. He would have to drink a potion everyday, and if he wanted to permanently alter a feature in similar ways to muggle surgery, there were spells that could do that. Unfortunately, those spells were almost impossible to find any information on, and the people who did do them would only do them if you met all of their criteria. Draco tried not to think about it too much. He wasn’t even allowed to take the potion until he was sixteen, so there would be no point worrying about that stuff just yet.

Draco brushed his hair out of his face. He was still adjusting to his first short haircut. It felt weird to not feel his hair blowing in the wind. Taking a deep breath in, Draco boarded the Hogwarts express. He immediately went into the bathroom on the train to change into his robes. He put a spell on an old black shirt so it would make his chest look flat. Much to his dismay, the spell would wear off quickly. He tried the spell on the shirt again, and it worked well, but he knew he’d have to excuse himself during the feast later in order to recast it. As he put on his robes, he sighed. No matter what he did, he couldn’t seem to get them to sit right on his body. He knew he was being stupid. He knew that they didn’t cling to the feminine curves of his body, they were about three sizes too big! Still, he tried to shake off the uncomfortable feeling and find somewhere to sit. Draco kept his head down, trying not to draw attention to himself, yet he still heard murmurs about him. 

‘Is that Draya?’ a fourth year Ravenclaw said to her friend.

‘I heard it got disowned. What a fucking delusional little thing,’ Said a seventh year Slytherin.

‘You know, I’d feel bad for her, I mean him, if he hadn’t been such a rotten person before. At least now he knows what it feels like to be hated over something so small,’ That voice belonged to Hermione Granger. For a moment, Draco felt bad for what he had put her through. He tried not to dwell on it and he ducked into the closest carriage, which had a few first years inside. Luckily, they paid no attention to him. He pulled out a book, hoping the journey wouldn’t be too boring

 

Sitting in the great hall was possibly the most awkward experience of Draco’s life. No one wanted to sit near him, and he could hear multiple people mocking him. He decided to keep his head down and not let them get a rise out of him. Everything would get easier when the sorting began. The first years still hadn’t been called in, but now in his fifth year, Draco was used to the long wait.

‘Malfoy, with me please. The headmaster wishes to discuss something with you,’ Snape said from behind Draco. Draco immediately got up and followed him to Dumbledore’s office.

‘Ah, Draya, I trust you know why I called you here?’ Dumbledore asked.

‘With all due respect, sir, I thought we already had everything sorted out. Also, you know that’s not my name anymore. My name is Draco,’ He said. If anything, Draco was always calm and assertive in situations like this.

‘Yes, I’m sorry, it slipped my mind. I’ll try to remember from now on.’ Dumbledore began to pour some tea for himself and Draco.

‘Now, I’m aware you and your family had a bit of an altercation after you came out,’ Dumbledore said.

‘Yes, but I’m living with a lovely family now, They let me be me,’ Draco replied.

‘Well, I’ve spoken to them, and they’ve given me the go ahead to let you see a specialist to talk to about your gender. They will see if you’re suitable to start hormone changing potions when you turn sixteen. You will speak with them every two weeks, and hopefully they’ll help you figure things out.’

Draco couldn’t hold back his tears. Everything he’d ever wanted seemed so close. It would make this year of bullying worth it. 

‘That's great! Thank you so much!’ he exclaimed. 

Draco left and went back to the Great Hall. He'd missed a good chunk of the sorting, with only three first years left to be sorted. He wished time would pass by quicker. He just wanted to get some food and get out. Once the feast began, he ate quickly then snuck off back to his room before anyone else could tease him. Tomorrow, classes would start. The real trouble had barely begun.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Like my work? Want to support a struggling writer? Please consider donating to my Ko-fi:
> 
> https://www.ko-fi.com/dean0772
> 
> Thanks for reading!


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Draco thinks a lot about his past actions and how he is treated now he's out as trans. He also has his first gender therapy appointment.

Draco had his first appointment with a gender specialist today. He felt a little uneasy, but he knew it would be something that would really improve his quality of life. This first week he had to get out of care of magical creatures for it, but the following appointments would be held outside of class time. Draco couldn’t help but feel nervous about having to get out of class. As it was a double period of care of magical creatures, he’d have to leave halfway through the class. Normally, this sort of thing rarely bothered Draco. Since news of his transition became public knowledge, small things like this terrified him. Every little thing was a window of opportunity for people to harass him. It bothered him and even only being two weeks into term time, it was beginning to really get to him. The only positive Draco could think of that came from this was that he knew it made him a better person. Going from being the top bully at school and making people’s lives a living hell, to being at the bottom of the pecking order and everyone’s target had certainly changed his outlook on life and how he treated people. Draco now understood how the people he bullied felt. Looking back, Draco hated who he was when he was the person who had everything. He hated how cruel and insufferable he was when he was the rich kid from a pureblood family. There was nothing Draco wanted more than to apologise to the people he previously bullied, but now most of them bullied him. He didn’t resent them for that. If he was in their position, he would probably do the same. The change in the power dynamic must have been intoxicating for them. As someone who had everything and became nothing, Draco could only imagine how amazing it would feel for those who were previously the bottom of the chain to suddenly hold power over someone. Especially someone who had previously held power over them. Draco knew there was no point trying to fight this delicate ecosystem, and decided to just try to get on with his life. Just keep his head down and focus on his work. If he tried to fight it, that would just make life much harder for himself. It was evident in how no one would defend him that he was truly hated by everyone. Draco normally wasn’t one to deal in black and white absolutes, but this definitely was a case of people either being with him or against him. No one was with him, nor did he expect anyone to be with him. Even the few out gay kids at Hogwarts were against him. It hurt to be shunned by people who supposedly share a community with you, but he understood it. For so long they were the freaks. They were the perverts who wanted to convert children to their cause. Now Draco was that scapegoat.

Draco made sure to get to care of magical creatures early. He had to hand Hagrid a note from Dumbledore explaining why he was leaving early. Hagrid had no love for Draco, but at least he wasn’t one of the teachers who outright picked on him during class. If anyone would understand why he would want to discreetly disclose his business, it would be Hagrid. One of Draco’s biggest regrets was how he had treated him in the past. Unfortunately, when Draco approached Hagrid’s hut, he could see that Harry, Ron, and Hermione were helping him prepare for the lesson. Approaching Hagrid now seemed impossible. It would be much easier to do this in front of a whole class rather than an intimate group of friends who are very close with the teacher. He turned to walk away when he heard Ron say rather loudly,

‘What’s that little prick doing here so early?’ Draco couldn’t help but smirk. Subtlety was never one of Ron’s strong points. 

He decided to turn back around and approach Hagrid. Though anxious, he hid it well, and seemed confident, perhaps a little cocky. Harry and Ron looked like they wanted to start a fight with him for the simple act of approaching the group, whereas Hermione just seemed to want to avoid any conflict.

‘Listen Draya, you have no reason to be here. Just go away,’ Harry said to him. The misnaming hurt Draco, but he decided to not show that.

‘It’s Draco, and as a matter of fact, I do have business here. I have a, er, letter to deliver to Hagrid. It’s from Dumbledore. Now if you don’t mind Potter, this is important.’ 

The look on Harry’s face was priceless. Just because Draco seemed to be the bottom of the pecking order at Hogwarts now, did not mean that he wouldn’t be assertive in situations where he could get away with it. He knew it would anger Harry and Ron, but he knew it would take a lot for them to hit a “girl” and he knew they weren’t exactly accepting of him being trans. Hermione was a different story. She had punched him in the face a couple years ago, and she seemed somewhat respectful of his gender identity. Maybe he’d try to talk to her at some point. If nothing else, he could apologise for how he treated her. Now was not the time, though. With Harry looking stunned and Ron looking furious, Draco approached Hagrid. 

‘Dumbledore says not to make a big deal of it, okay?’ Draco said, handing him the note. He knew it was risky to try to command Hagrid, but he assumed Hagrid would get what he means. When Hagrid had finished reading the letter, he moved closer to Draco and said,

‘You just leave when you need to, I won’t say a thing.’

Draco appreciated this. Now, the rest of the Gryffindors and Slytherins were arriving at the hut for the lesson, so Draco as usual moved to the back of the class and patiently paid attention. Today’s lesson was about Graphorns today, and luckily it was something Draco had studied in his spare time. The first half of the lesson went quite well, and Draco could tell that the second half was just going to be more of the same introductory information. When it came time to leave, Draco simply snuck away, or tried to anyway. Despite being at the back of the class, someone’s eyes must have been on him. He heard a voice shout ‘Oh look! Draya is away to get her sex change!’

The statement was followed by an eruption of laughter. Draco couldn’t turn back around and face it. He felt tears welling in his eyes.

‘That’s enough!’ Hagrid’s voice boomed. ‘Now, as I was saying…’ He continued, jumping right back into the lesson.

Draco walked away from the class very quickly. He wanted to cry, but he knew showing up to this appointment a weeping mess would not work out in his favour. Instead, he decided to just focus on each step he took. With each step, the sadness faded and anger built up in its place. How dare they be so rude? Do they not know how dangerous Draco could be. Yeah, he didn’t hold the same position of power as he did previously, but he definitely knew how to fight. Both in the muggle way and the wizarding way. The next person who tried anything would be getting the brunt of Draco’s anger. He knew he would get in trouble for it, but at least it may stop the harassment he was facing. 

Once he arrived at the room his appointment was in, he was greeted by an older woman with long, fair hair and black rectangle glasses that made the features of her thin face look rather harsh. 

‘Hello, you must be Draco. Please, take a seat. My name is Anna Copperhan. I’ll be handling your case from now until you feel you have reached a point in your transition that you can leave our care,’ She said.

Draco sat on a comfortable chair facing Anna’s desk. ‘Pleased to meet you,’ Draco responded. 

‘Now, today is going to be an assessment. Don’t worry, we ask everyone these questions and I know they may feel quite personal but please answer honestly. The assessment can take up to two hours, which I know is quite exhausting, so if you need a break at anytime, let me know.’

Draco was taken aback by how quickly they were getting into things, but he was excited to begin. ‘Thanks, should we begin?’ he asked.

‘Yes. Now these first few questions will be about your childhood.’ With that, the interview process began.

For the most part, the interview was just boring questions about his childhood and how he felt about his body. He answered honestly. Yes, he always felt like he should have been with the boys and had male friends, no, he didn’t fit in with the girls. Puberty was distressing because he felt his body was developing the wrong way and it became very obvious he wasn’t a boy. Yes, he hated his chest and his genitals. Of course he dressed as a boy in secret for years, but only publicly done so for six months, although he was very much a tomboy before then. It was all standard stuff nosy people asked him about all the time anyway. What made him uncomfortable were the questions about his sexuality. Draco confessed to being bisexual, which he didnt think would be a big deal. That is until he was asked super personal questions about his love life. Draco said he hadn’t dated anyone before, but he was still asked about what role he would prefer in sexual situations. This made him very uncomfortable. He was only fifteen. Sure, people his age had sex, but he knew he definitley didn’t, nor did he want to. Legally, he couldn’t even consent, so he didn’t understand why he was being asked about this. He just said he didn’t think about it too much because it made him dysphoric. This seemed to satisfy Anna. The appointment overall was dull, and the two hours really dragged on. 

‘Okay, I’m going to write up your answers and we’ll go through what you said and what it all means at our next appointment. After speaking to you, it is very clear you are suffering from gender dysphoria. Our appointments from here on out will be about helping you cope with this mentally, and discussing what you want to do with your transition. Our next appointments will be about an hour long, and they’ll be on the second and fourth Thursday of each month after your classes. It was lovely to meet you, but I do have to get going. Goodbye, Draco.’

Draco began walking to the common room. It was dinnertime, but Draco decided not to eat tonight. It wasn’t that he wasn’t hungry, he just didn’t feel like being around people right now. That appointment was very tiring, and he knew he would not be able to mentally deal with the harassment he would face. No, tonight he just wanted to go to his room and do some studying. OWLs were this year, and Draco wanted to be well prepared. Despite not reaching his potential thus far in his education, Draco was incredibly smart when he applied himself. Now that he just focused on his education as opposed to his social life and bullying people, his grades were fast improving. His homework scores were always either perfect or near perfect, and he knew teachers were beginning to expect him to flourish this year. It surprised everyone. Hermione pretended it didn’t get to her, but Draco noticed the fire in her eyes any time he done as good or better than her. Unlike Hermione, Draco wasn’t one to flaunt his intellect. Hermione would always answer in class and try to impress teachers, whereas Draco would just quietly take in the information and throw in some extra stuff when he wrote essays. He supposed the intent of putting his own extra knowledge into essays and homework could be viewed as him trying to impress teachers, but Draco didn’t see it this way. The extra information was usually just so he could be confident he wasn’t leaving anything out, and because it was usually important to the subject anyway. Half of the extra information he included should be taught, or at least that’s what Draco thought. 

Once Draco had finished doing his homework and some studying, he went to bed. Hopefully, tomorrow would be better than today.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know it's been like seven months since I updated, I promise that it won't always be like that. I'm going to attempt to update a little more regularly. My mental health got really bad, so writing was very difficult. 
> 
> Like my work? Want to support a struggling writer? Please consider donating to my Ko-fi:
> 
> https://www.ko-fi.com/dean0772
> 
> Thanks for reading!


End file.
